As of recently, there has been a propaganda in the media to promote interracial unions between those of African descent and those of Caucasian and other non Black races. Such promotion of miscegenation has many people apprehensive about it’s effect on the livelihood of Black women’s psyche and livelihood. While I am seeing more interracial couplings becoming more represented in the media and in real life, I don’t see dating and marrying a White man as the end to be all. Though I am not against interracial dating and marriage, I believe that much of the rhetoric behind the so called ”swirl movement” is detrimental to the livelihood and psyche of Black women living in the West.
The media depicts women of African descent to be loud, unattractive, overweight, aggressive, perpetually single and having bad attitudes. Many articles written online and subliminal and overt messages from television ads, movies and television shows how undesirable Black women supposedly are. So undesirable that their own men don’t want them. Unfortunately, many Black men are colorist, misogynist and despise Black women to the point that they have also played a role in promoting negative anti Black woman stereotypes. Many Black girls and women have stories to tell about how many Black men express their preference for mixed race women and non Black women while disparaging their own female counterparts. It has gotten so widespread that a segment of Black men have outlets on YouTube and other social media outlets to express their disdain for Black women’s obesity, fake hair, bad attitudes and behavior. Men like Tommy Sotomayor are the leading progenitors of anti Black woman media propaganda. Even Black orientated shows and movies contain colorist messages and actions in it; example: the 1990s TV show, Martin. Many Black women especially Black American women have taken note and expressed their disgust of the ongoing slander against them from Black men. As a result, many Black American have decided to open up their dating options to include non Black men due to frustration of denigration from their own male counterparts.
Anti Black woman hater, Tommy Sotomayor, who has various YouTube channels bashing Black women.
An image of an interracial coupling of a Black man and White woman
Black woman White man coupling.
Black American women are one of the least likely groups of people to date and marry interracially. The majority of Black American women prefer to date and marry Black American men and have children of African descent that reflects their image. Black American men are twice as likely to marry outside of their race than Black American women. But things are starting to change. Slowly, more Black American women are opening their options to include non Black men. I am seeing more American Black women being seen in public with White men and non Black men of other races. On the other hand, many Black women, who reside in Canada and the United Kingdom(Great Britain), are much more willing and open to dating and marrying non Black men than their American counterparts. In fact, majority of the Black women in Canada and the UK tend to be recent immigrants from the Caribbean, Latin America and Africa. The countries and societies in these countries lack the same racial and social divide and convention that America has so there is less apprehension on these women’s parts. In fact, 35% of Afro British women of Caribbean heritage are with White men in Britain as opposed to 12% of American Black women that are married to non Black men. The cultural and regional differences between American Black women and other Black women residing in other Western countries play a role in how they approach interracial dating and marriage. And this plays a huge role in why interracial dating and marriage is much higher for non African American Black women than it is for African American women.
What does your apprehension about this so called swirl movement comes from?
My apprehension about the ”swirl movement” comes from my own experiences and hang ups regarding my interactions with men. I didn’t have much luck attracting Black men due to the fact that my phenotype was too ”Negroid” for their tastes and my interests in Rock music was also a turn off. I grew up hearing Black boys my age express their disdain for Black women and ”preference” for non Black women. Everywhere, I turned I saw media depictions of Black women’s undesirability and unattractive. It made me so sad to see that even my own male counterparts didn’t find me attractive so I decided to seek validation from non Black men for my beauty. Though I had always been attracted to White and non Black men, I knew that it was time to really consider them as a dating option regardless of what anyone thought. I tried to date a White American seriously, but it usually ended up with them fetishizing me and not progressing into a relationship. Or they expressed desire not to date a Black women. Such experiences also influence my concerns about other Black women’s idealizing interracial relationships as a panacea for her low self esteem. I know all too well how it is like to be rejected on the basis of my skin color and not being seen as worthy. I used to fetishize interracial relationships and believe that it will make me be seen as worthy and desirable in society. Then, I realized that it is best that I find love and happiness within before I ever start to find a mate. How can you expect someone to love one when you don’t love yourself? To this day, I still struggle with feelings of inadequacy, but I am working on these issues to better myself.
My major concern is the fact that Black American women will romanticize White American men as these knights in shining armor. In reality, the same media that promotes negative imagery of Black women was created and is sustained by White men. The casting couches in Hollywood TV, movie and commercial sets are usually White men and White women. These same people promote White women and other non Black women ahead of Black women on the social and beauty hierarchy. The same White men that enslaved and raped my female foremothers and presented her as the most undesirable woman on the planet. The same White man that created the system of racism, sexism and colorism to sustain White supremacy and keep all of the wealth and resources in their hands. In fact, the effects of colonization and European imperialism can still be felt through the social inequalities in Black communities across the nation. He elevates White women to the image of beauty because he cherishes his image as the most beautiful and powerful on the planet. And even if a White American man does date and marry a Black woman, his loyalty is still to his race first and foremost. The marriage numbers between White American men and Black American are despondently low. According to the 2010 census, only one hundred and sixty eight thousand White men are married to Black women. Such marriages make up only 0.3% of the population of White male population married couples. These numbers very low and shows that White American men and Black American women aren’t marrying each other in substantial numbers to express the so called swirl movement’s belief that the White man is what the Black woman really wants. Until marriage rates increase between this demographic of people and the imagery of Black women in the media changes for the better, I don’t believe that the Black American can rely on White American men or any man as a marriage partner.
In actuality, I believe it is a good idea that more Black American women are considering interracial dating and marriage. But I don’t necessarily see it as the solution to the so called marriage crisis in the Black collective. As interracial unions increase between Black women and White men, will such unions really break down the social and racial conventions in society? Only time will tell.
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